Success: Real and Ridiculous

Ask anybody what they want in life and I can guarantee you their answer will be “success”. They may not say the word exactly, but that’s what they mean. They may say they want the money, the cars, the clothes and (if their parents didn’t raise them with manners) the hoes, but really, they just want to be successful. Drake taught me that.

A quick scroll through any social media site tells me that while most people want success, they have no idea what it takes to have it. There are tons of workshops, books and advice- giving blogs about how to achieve success in this area of life and in that one. Podcasts, live social media videos and exclusive groups all have been made to impart the secret to success but because success looks different for different people, there is no one size fits all formula that will guarantee it. There are plenty of tips on what may or may not work, and you should definitely take heed, but ultimately, being successful is a very personal journey and while you navigate that journey, there are two things that will help you along the way: equal parts reality and ridiculousness.

Being successful at anything, no matter what it is, requires the ability to look at a problem or look at something that you want in life and say, “I’m going to get this no matter what happens. No matter what comes in front of me, no matter what obstacle I face, I am going to get it.” And then, you have to go get it! You pursue success like you’ve never pursued anyone or anything in your life! Even if the odds are against you, you have to make moves like the odds are wrong. To other people, you may look downright foolish, and maybe in some instances you are, but you go after it anyway. Because it’s your dream, and only you can see it. This is more than motivation; this is the ridiculous pursuit of your dreams and without it, you will never achieve success.

On the other hand, being successful takes a hearty dose of realism, too. Sure, you are being ridiculous in your pursuit of your dreams, but you also recognize that you live and move in reality. This means that there’s going to be some obstacles along the way and that everything is not going to go exactly the way that you want it to go. This also means that things won’t be easy, you will have to work for your success, you will make mistakes and you will fail, but your ridiculousness, your seemingly insane quest for greatness, will help you overcome. Ridiculousness gives you the confidence you need to succeed but reality gives you the tools. With reality, you learn to do better, you figure out what you need, you master the art of your craft and you get it done.

You’ve got big dreams; we all do, but no matter what your goal is, if you want to be successful, you must figure out how to maintain an unwavering belief in yourself and your abilities while maneuvering through reality. You must be 100% real and out of your mind ridiculous… at the same damn time.

Post Author: Eboni Harris

Eboni Harris is a relationship therapist and Founder/Editor-in-Chief of Room for Relations and host of Room for Relations: Sex and Relationship Podcast. Through her education she has learned the skills and techniques to help individuals and couple love better, stronger and longer. Through life she has learned that taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do for you and the ones you love. Her goal is to help adults communicate with clarity and honesty, love with passion and intention and teach their offspring (little ones) the value of boundaries, compassion and trust.